guess facebook do cause the declining post in lj.

anyway was thinking being neutral to all sides is not so good afterall. let us just not say anything about the side effect.

often miss the past but guess it is time to move on. everyone embrace new lifestyle. shouldn't me? things hardly last so one's adaptability must be strong. :D

I shall await to forge more nice and meaningful memories.

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Hmmm how do one feel when one had helped the other yet the helper feel that he had harmed the one being helped? Sigh...

gosh the high class power evil bitch just called for my help again! At least she sound better this time. worse thing is, i had this de ja vu. shivers

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Woke up by the stupid caller. Was talking to the caller (let's called her the sg girl who sucks at speaking english ; SGSSE)

Me: Erm what's the dress code?
(thinking if it is a agency then can anyhow wear)
SGSSE: you want the address?
Me: no i mean the dress.
SGSSE: Our company is at jurong....
(continue rattling on)
Me: ok fine. can u just send me ur email of ur company.

Drove to the company place and realised there are few blocks there. So i call to check again
This time a new girl pick up(let's called her the tamil girl who sucks at english; TGSSE)

ME: Which is your company block huh?
TGSSE: huh?
(i repeated myself again)
TGSSE: huh? u wait huh.

This time she passed it to the SGSSE again. lucky this time she ROUGHLY tell me where issit.
I super pissed le. Didnt care that i was late too. Went there fill up a stupid online application form. Was super pissed that i anyhow filled and gave one or two sentences for description questions. After that went to interview. I was rattling abt programming then i realised the job scope wasnt programming. super paiseh but try to twist the situation lo.
Was feeling ok with the job scope the boss was telling me until he say i need to travel at least once a month. i am like... Still cant handle it ba... See how it goes ba...

Hmmm it's weird... i once thought one guy that i will never really be happy till the day i ORD. Suprisingly, though i ORD the feeling was like "So What"? Not that i still miss NS(hate every bones abt it) or trying to make a mockery out of those poor ns men who are still suffering. just do not know what's wrong with me. probably the end of this lowest-life-form lifestyle marks the heavy responsibilities of adulthood. no more "I thought" and "Maybe" and it is more of "You should know" and "How would you not know?". Right now, just wanna take a step to my comfort zone for a while. The lady was right, i had not been happy for a very long time. reason? no idea. But i believe food and money will never fail to put a wide smile on my face. Not materialistic, just realistic. that's y :)

Hmmm so before ORD, need to do this stupid FFI thingie. I really scared when it comes to needles. no choice need to draw some stupid blood. If i go alone, still ok. End up i go with the other 5 specs. I was kinda the last one. Worse case, i kena a newbie. The senior was like guiding the newbie how to draw blood and i was sweating like shit lo. Why am i the guinea pig. LL so end up the newbie experimented on me, he really did a lousy job. Not only did he not draw enough blood, he even left me a nice "love bite" on my arm...




After that, the senior medic just gave a quick jab on my the other arm. Sian lo. one day 2 jabs... so hate needles now...

Hmmm was feeling horrendous ytd becoz my sm asked us go back to camp. thought wat happened. end up, it was a booze party for the old specs as we r gonna ord soon. i became public enemy as usual. Drink until real drunk... Woke up the next day to rush to go the stupid career fair. waste time but i really appreciate shin actually took care of me while i try to recover from the terrible hang over. It was the worse hang over i ever had. thx to vodka peach shot + tiger beer. super horrible experience....

Recently caught 2 movies in one row. "Management" and "The proposal". Both are love comedy movie but "management" isnt as good as the latter. Though "management" is more touching than "the proposal", "management" lacks of climatic scene. On the other hand, "the proposal" lacks of certain realism. Imagine your long time arc - enemy becomes a person u love in a week time? Then again watching all this love comedy movies doesnt require any realism so just enjoyed the movies. Esp wont both the lead actors in the movies are hunks. lol.

~

AHM was crappy to me as my body wasnt in good condition plus i skipped so many training. lots of men are walking so i ended up running alone. super no motivation can. lol. lucky still pull through of course with horrendous timing but i dun care. :P

Hmmm more and more frens are joining the teaching force.... of coz i never consider that at all. Having problems handling men in my camp. dun think i can handle those small devils... Plus seeing some of those teachers so stressed up, doubt i have what it takes to be a one. :D

Hmmmm didnt do much today ba. other than sleeping... It was fun taking max(the chihuahua) for a walk though he is a bit asthmatic and can stoned sometimes. just looking him running around the court can somehow make me feel happy and relax. Perhaps those who keep pets can live longer ba...

hmmm guess it is like eons ago ever since i blog... many things happened. some were pleasant while others are best to kept under the carpet. Often i do wonders, if such a short time, many things can happened, what will happened after some years had passed. Learn quite a few things after this few months( applying it is the other case). Well at least now i think i have a better view of things. It's always through experience then u will see how things are... Enough of this mood... Well after so long, i finally going to ORD... though it is still quite long but better than nth. Anything worth remembering in the army? Nahz. Hopefully can get a job str8 away. no time to waste...

( Do Not Click if u r sick of dramatic whining... )

On a lighter note, guess i need to quickly find a job soon after i ord. no intention to slack ard and there goes my overseas vacation. Last time was so crazy abt ord vacation but with the recession so bad, being practical is still the best....

When can i see him again?

Hmmm Just finished serving my first instalment of chain-multiple-duties. Didnt charge myself much and i be starting my second instalment in another few hours. Feel super sianz. Been losing contacts with many of my frens though.

Self-Delusion is one way to escape problem. One can lied to the whole world but one cant lied to himself. I admit that it is hard me to accept a lot of things. Be it Self-denial or Self delusion... Wat seems to be solution turns out to be a bigger mess. When i parted just now, i just cant stop this sourish feeling in my eyes. The next moment, my vision went blur... When can i come terms to myself?

hmmm acc him to went shopping with him. am glad that he gt a friutful reward... didnt know that queensway gt so many good stuff... Envious of him becoz he got the height and the built to carry out almost a lot of clothes. clothes just look nice of him... bo bian lo. people are blessed with good look, height and the built. i remmeber whenever i dragged my fren out shopping, it will be ended up in such a way that they buy a lot of things and i gt nth. need to shed some extra fats le... Only then i can buy a lot of clothes...

hmmm eric helped me fixed my GPS le. now with my htc diamond touch, i wont be geographically challenge. =)

hmmm i am still sad... dunno how things goes... =( how?

Hmmm when mood is down, eat is the only way!!!! munch down lots of fatty food alrdy. prob another exucse for me to feast but dun care. binge then exercise next.

mind is in great turbulent ba... really dunno how... wanting it badly yet cant exactly get it. holding on to it yet still feel so helpless... wanting it to have its own happiness by setting it free yet becoz too selfish, refuse to let go. mood is in a bottleneck.

sigh... things really change...
how? :'(

hmmmm just wondering him, does he miss me when i am not ard... i still miss him as much...

~~

Anyway, kena arrow to go for NDP performance. sianz, there goes my weekend. somemore with SAF day. super sianz. muz quickly ord! Now go outfield also cant bring hp, super stupid. then again, hp is always silent de. lol

Hmmm recently came across 最熟悉的陌生人(luxy remix)... not bad though...

还记得吗 窗外那被月光染亮的海洋
你还记得吗 是爱让彼此把夜点亮
为何后来我们 用沉默替代依赖
曾经朗朗星空 渐渐阴霾

心碎离开 转身回到最初荒凉里等待
为了寂寞 是否找个人填心中空白
我们变成了世上 最熟悉的陌生人
今后各自曲折 各自悲哀

只怪我们爱得那么汹涌 爱得那么深
于是梦醒了 搁浅了 沉默了挥手了 却回不了神
如果当初在交会时能忍住了 激动的灵魂
也许今夜我不会让自己在思念里 沉沦

我们变成了世上最熟悉的陌生人
今后各自曲折 各自悲哀

sigh...